26 Comments
Nov 10Liked by Brendon Holder

what a piece. i've been thinking a lot about time and how false it feels despite it's consequences being very real, how it feels like everything is repeating. i didn't have the words to express that anxiety but of course you would. thank you for writing this, and for your intelligence. it makes me feel sane.

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ayan 💙 this means so much, thank you! yeah, ive been having difficulty putting a pin in things in regards to time. the years feel long and slow at the same time. i hope you’re doing well 🕊️

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Nov 10Liked by Brendon Holder

Wow. Your language is so beautiful, descriptive, but still concise. This was such a fantastic read. The insight into reflection and the way it shows up daily is so interesting. It reminds me of that idea of mirrors being too accessible now. Thinking about a time before mirrors when one only saw oneself in still bodies of water where they had to stoop down and assert a very specific position that hails to that water for reflecting them. Now everything is a reflective surface one way or another. You’re amazing for this.

I also love how much you self reference cause yeah…actually I did say that!

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thank you so much for your kind words!!! there’s so much mirroring that happens on the internet and with culture — some of it good, some of it bad that I wanted to also apply the idea of “mirroring” by referencing myself over and over again to drive the point home. i appreciate you reading 🙏🏿

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the way you connected the concept to the results of the election and brat summer was enlightening and done better than many others on this platform trying to demystify the democrats' loss in relation to young people & the internet. i also feel like my days are blurring together, and like they have been for a long time. i don't think it's entirely responsible, but i'm starting to blame the internet and the unrestricted access i had to it from such a young age. i deleted instagram and tiktok a while ago and now only occasionally doomscroll on reddit or youtube shorts by accident, but i'm still struggling to understand how exactly to cure what ails me. right now i think that it's probably continuing to stay off of any type of socials, intentionally consuming long-form media, and embracing mindfulness and meditation. i wish i had a definitive answer.

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thanks for reading and for sharing your experience. i also find that the scrolling prevents mindfulness and from noticing the differences of what comes in front of you. its a numbing that is helpful when we are overstimulated by so many things but it feels like you're riding through life through a thick gauze. i don't want to say goodbye to the internet but definitely what to adjust my relationship with it moving forward.

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Nov 20Liked by Brendon Holder

This is an incredible piece! Everything is so articulated so well!

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thank you!!

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Nov 19Liked by Brendon Holder

This piece is amazing and cut through a lot for me today. thank you!

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thanks so much for reading :)

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Nov 17Liked by Brendon Holder

Being afraid to be on the internet because of all the chaos we scroll through but also finding a way for it to mind your thoughts is such a bizarre universal experience today. I remember when I would get on the internet for funny videos, casual connection but also to disconnect. Now we're so connected and I'm so anxious for the state of everybody around me.

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Yeah I agree! It’s unpredictable because it represents our world — it can bring us joy, relief and anxiety with each scroll. Thanks so much for reading.

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This is such an incredible piece. I wanted to underline the whole thing. (Also: the concept of 'rawdogging' the world is hilarious and terrifying. I salute you).

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ahhh thank you so much hannah! I appreciate your kind words. LOL yes 'rawdogging the world' is a fun one I threw in there :)

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Nov 13Liked by Brendon Holder

Such a thought provoking and insightful write up. 🤍

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thank you Mia! Appreciate you reading :)

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Nov 11Liked by Brendon Holder

Have you ever read Walter Benjamin’s Work of Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction? This piece reminded me of it, but Tiktokified if that makes sense lol. Amazing work

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I had not but I just read up on it and am mesmerized by the idea of art’s ‘cult value’ and ‘exhibition value.’ how when art is moves from being a ‘cult object’ to an ‘exhibition object,’ it increases accessibility but loses its context and cultural roots / aura (its funny that he was talking about aura back then). this translates directly to online platforms like TikTok as everything is seen by millions and becomes exhibited but loses its context. a reminder that content is not always art. very helpful, thank you for mentioning and putting me on!!!

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Nov 11Liked by Brendon Holder

Loved this Brendon! Especially the zone of interest / Gaza point - I have not come across these videos of Renad cooking and, for lack of a more eloquently phrased response, I feel very weird after watching that.

PS you can definitely keep going with no TikTok. I deleted it in May and I have never returned. While I do miss it sometimes, the net effect of not being on it is something I can really feel. I found the NYT Games a good substitute when my fingers or brain started to feel twitchy for tiktok.

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Thank you for reading!! Yeahs the Renad stuff is very Black Mirror

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Nov 11Liked by Brendon Holder

This has put into words so many of the feelings that crop up but I quickly numb out with Tiktok or some other app because I do not want to fully examine what it all means. Really insightful. To feel like it's a shared experience makes me feel a little bit better.

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Thank you for saying this. I don’t think it’s bad to have something on to numb but I had just thought that it was becoming an unconscious decision, so much so that I relied on it and it had to go for a bit.

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Nov 10Liked by Brendon Holder

beautiful writing to speak about the real horror happening. and god the exhaustion of everything we say even in passing having to be a reference and carrying a slightly tongue in cheek tone. “so X of X” “very X”. i find myself so thirsty for the real.

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it’s like everything needs credentials rather than just existing!

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yes, the current state of the internet makes it so much easier for us all to live in a sort of “cult” where we’re only surrounded by voices that seem so much like our own. yes, this is creating a rift between us and our neighbours and can feel almost apocalyptic. but I do feel like referencing the past and making media more digesteble by doing so is nothing new. things that feel recognizable are less scary and makes it way easier to slowly get introduced to new concepts. change was never fast. all over history the big scary things that were happening were made digestable by approaching them in a recognizable, humorous way. while reading this article I couldn’t help but think about the cartoons made about hitler in the second world war. what differentiates those from a meme about trump? I think there’s two separate concepts this article touches on, and I think it’s important to look at those in a historical context. the sense of losing yourself in media to distract from the world’s problems (thus feeling the days are repeating themselves) is nothing new. the media in which we’re doing this is.

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Struggling to catch my breath since you’ve taken all the words out of my mouth. Thank you. This was such a joy to read!

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